❛ CHAPTER THREE ━ GROCERY GAMES ❜
𖤐¸𓍢 ━━ ❪ ACT ONE OF SOULBOUND ❫ ˖ ୧ 。
◟ ✦ SOMETIMES MY FEELINGS SCARE ME ❞

LITTLE EYES FOLLOWED THE TOY CAR as it drove across the bumpy wooden porch. Her lips puckered in small engine noises as she moved it in circles. It was a noise that she always heard when she was in the car with Dean, the humming of the motor that made her feel safe.

By mistake, the toy car crashed down the steps, smacking the wood.

Olive paused, frowning when she looked down at the red car that was now flipped over, wheels still rolling.

Her heart pumped in her ears like white noise, her breath becoming uneven. Sophia. The man in the cabin.

With a sudden pit in her stomach Olive thickly swallowed, she decided that she didn't want to play with the car anymore. The memories of Sophia swerving on the road and into that tree made her head spin.

Olive left it on the porch and made her way inside.

Dean and Olive had been staying with Lisa and Ben for what seemed like forever now, which in reality was only a month or so. Olive still flinched at any loud noise or fast movements.

She mostly spent her days on the porch, sitting down and staring at the road, or in the garage with Dean, watching him fix things and listen to stories about his time with Sam.

She loved those stories.

She'd give anything to meet Sam Winchester in person. He was extraordinary to her.

Olive loves the stories so much, that she wanted to learn more about the things that go bump in the night. The things that want her for reasons she didn't understand.

But a week ago Olive snuck into the Impala, which was now covered by a tarp, and snagged the leather journal in the glove compartment with the initials J.W. in the corner.

When Dean was looking for work and Lisa assumed Olive was learning how to read from the children's books that she bought her, Olive was actually hiding in Ben's old treehouse in the backyard, flashlight in hand and sounding out the lore inside the journal.

"Seen Dean?" Olive voiced as she walked into the kitchen, looking around only to find Lisa cooking dinner.

It seems like ever since she got there Olive had only spoken to Lisa in short sentences, and that was only on good days.

"He's in the garage, fixing the truck with Ben," Lisa answered, turning around with a smile.

It quickly dropped when she noticed Olive's attire, she was filthy, dirty, and chalk staining her shirt. Olive didn't seem to care one bit.

"Why don't you wash up? Dinner is going to be ready soon."

Olive didn't look up from the bowl of strawberries on the table when she plopped a large one in her mouth. "No." Her voice was soft, muffled.

It was a simple word really, one that Dean often used against her when she wanted something that he couldn't get. Like a Zebra.

Lisa raised her eyebrows in disbelief. "No?"

Not wanting to start an argument Olive jumped off of the stool, ramming another strawberry into her mouth before walking away. "I'll be outside."

And with that, she's gone. Lisa would have to talk to Dean about it.

It's not that she didn't like Lisa. The woman was exactly what Olive expected her to be. Beautiful, kind, and understanding.

But that was probably the reason why Olive didn't want to get attached to her. Sophia was still burned in her brain. Her own mother still haunting her dreams.

Olive admired Lisa greatly, but that didn't mean she had to talk to her.

The girl sat on the steps on the porch, her eyes raising towards the burning sun with a squint before digging into the pockets of her overalls. Something was happening to her and she didn't know what, all she knew was that she didn't feel like herself anymore.

Maybe it was the trauma.

A word she heard Dean and Lisa talking about when referring to her. Maybe it was the paranoia that kept her up.

Or maybe, maybe it was because there was a fire buried deep in her chest, the type of fire that she knew was there. She gripped onto the star charm that dangled on her neck, thinking.

Dean told her the Marge died because of the charm, that it protected her from the demon. But deep down Olive knew it was something else, something Dean didn't want her to know. Something that was finally ready to come out.

"Hey there." Lisa smiled as she ruffled Ben's hair. "Go take a shower, you're greasy." She teased, watching as her son grinned back before dashing up the stairs, if only Olive was that easy. Seconds later Dean emerged from the back door, a smile taking over his face as he kissed his girlfriend on the cheek.

"Where's, O?" Dean looked around the house, only to frown slightly when the five-year-old was nowhere in sight.

"Porch." She gave him a knowing look that made him sigh.

"Again? She's always out there." He notes as he looked out the kitchen window to confirm her whereabouts. There she was, sitting down watching the road like she did every day since they got here.

"Dean. ." At the sound of his name, Dean turned to face his girlfriend, who didn't look happy. "We need to talk about this."

"About what?" He tilted his head, his eyebrows knitted in confusion although deep down he knew exactly what Lisa was talking about.

"About Olive. .She came inside earlier, she looked like she dragged around in the mud, I asked her to take a shower and she told me no." Lisa explained. "She sits out there for hours, almost like some guard dog. It's like she's waiting for something bad to happen. Don't you find that a little odd?"

"So? she's an odd kid, who cares?" Dean got defensive.

"You should care." She gave him a look. "If this is her way of coping with everything then it isn't healthy. She's five. Maybe we should get her special help, from a-a therapist! She's obviously in pain—"

"Well yeah, she's in pain, Lisa. Getting abandoned, kidnapped, tortured, and attacked all in the span of a year does that to some people! She's scared." Dean leaned against the kitchen counter, face red.

     "Look. Olive has a really bad life and it doesn't get easier. I am trying to pick up her piece and manage mine, I-" He sighed, "I don't feel comfortable with her talking to a stranger when she can talk to me. She's coping in her own way. So am I." He explains, "Whatever we have so far, or progress, it works."

Lisa sighed in defeat, "I don't want to force anything...I guess I just wished she'd open up more."

Dean nodded and rose a finger, a small smile on his face, as he tapped at the window. Olive's head shot up, looking at Dean with wide eyes, he waved at her, causing her to grin widely and wave back. "She will." He said fondly, "Just give her a little more time."

‧₊ ❁ཻུ۪۪.;:୭̥.┊

HOVERING AT THE BATHROOM door, Olive watched Dean get ready for a job interview that Lisa set him up with, swinging on the door knob with a loud rapid creak. Dean sighs, ignoring her at first. Until the creaking got louder.

"Olive," He warns, looking at her through the bathroom mirror, pulling the razor off his face to say, "Stop it."

"Why do you have to go?" She complains.

He scoffs, "Someone's gotta pay for your milkshake addiction. Besides, I need a distraction," He admits lightly.

Dean was starting to feel anxious living with Lisa and Ben, his depression was kicking in and his alchol habits were picking up again. He didn't want Olive to see him that way.

"I can distract you!" Olive promises, running away from the bathroom. She comes back minutes later with a deck of cards, "See, look!"

Dean watched with a blank face as Olive spread the cards on the ground and asked him to pick one.

He does.

"Okay, put it back." She orders quick, grabbing the card and roughly shoving it into the deck.

Olive shuffles.

Dean tried holding back his smile, his face still lathered in shaving cream.

Her determination for him to not leave the house reminded him of Sam. When he was younger, he'd beg Dean to stay home from a hunt with John.

He missed that feeling of being needed.

"Is this your card?"

"No."

"Damn." She cursed.

A large grin broke from his face, "Close enough though, you'll figure it out."

She sighs, "I can't make you can I? Not even if I promise not drink milkshakes every again?"

He shakes his head, "I don't believe addicts," He jokes, "Tell you what," He grabs the shaving cream off the counter, "You can get ready with me."

"Really?"

Dean shakes the bottle, squeezing a bit of shaving foam on her hand.

She brings her hand close up to her face with a toothy grin, "Marshmellow."

He motions for Olive to come closer and she rushes to stand on the toilet, closing her eyes when Dean brought her hand to her face and rubbed it against her cheek.

Laughter.

That seemed to be the sound Dean was after nowadays.

The way her eyes scrunched with her nose when she giggled, pulling away at the cold foam that now frosted her smiling face.

It made Dean feel like he could do this.

Olive opened one eye, looking into the bathroom mirror, "I look like an old man," She concludes in the best old man voice she could think of.

"Hey," Dean narrows playfully.

Olive takes the razor-less razor Dean gives her, "Alright now watch how I do it," He instructs, running the razor down on his cheek nice and slow.

Slowly, she copied. Dean watched as Olive got so enchaced by what she was doing in the mirror that she didn't even notice Dean was washed and finished.

She continued to brush the plastic on her face and dump it in the sink with the shake of the razor as Dean slowly moved around his room and got dressed.

He couldn't help but pat himself on the back for the distraction.

"I finished!" Olive announced, happily wiping her face on a towel and running out of the room, "Dean! I finished. Do I look any younger?!"

Dean comes out of the closet, fixing a tie on his neck, "You could pass for three," He nods. She high-five's herself and Dean to raise an eyebrow, "What are you doing?"

She looked up at him, eyes wide.

"Only nerds high-five themselves," He educates, holding out his palm, "As long as I'm around you high-five me, no matter what. It means everything's totally awesome."

Olive grinned, jumping up to slap her palm against his, "You're leaving now aren't you?"

"You gonna be a baby about it?" Dean asked, walking out of the room with his keys.

"No," Olive groans, following him out, "I just don't want to talk to Lisa—"

Dean grimaced, "Yeah, about that, be nice to Lisa, okay? She thinks you hate her guts. She also thinks you're part grayhound with all that porch sittin' you're doing."

"I thought adults liked with kids played outside," Olive grumbled.

"Yeah, but you don't play, you watch," Dean corrects, grabbing his coat and stopping at the door, "I'm not going to force you, but for my sake, just be nice and socialize."

Olive crossed her arms at the door, "I'm never talking to you again when you come back!" She vows.

Dean rolled his eyes, "See you later?"

She instantly smiles, "Yeah! Have fun!"

With a scratch at her head, Dean was out of the house and was gone for at least an hour when Olive decided to visit Ben in his room.

She liked Ben. He knew a lot of things that Olive didn't about people and the world.

"What's this?" Olive asked, lifting a large blue book over her head. She swayed on her feet, looking up at the book. "Spass."

At first, he was annoyed, he didn't like how Olive would hop around his room and asking him random questions about things he couldn't answer.

Like "why was waffles shaped in circles?" and "why are birds born with wings but people aren't?"

After a few weeks of her random dancing and questions, Ben found himself enjoying her company. Their six-year difference was looked over and a small friendship bonding between them.

Ben actually found himself to be expecting Olive to barge in.

Ben looked away from his play station, pausing his game. "Space." He corrects, lifting up from the floor and taking the book from her hands before she dropped it on her face. "It's a book about planets and stars. I got it from the book fair last year. You can have it if you want."

"Like this one?" Her eyes widened happily, lifting up the charm.

"Yup. That's a Star."

Olive took the book back, watching as Ben sat back down. "Ben?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't know how to read well." She explained. "Can you teach me?"

Ben looked between her and his game before sighing softly and turning it off. "Sure." She smiled before running towards him and dropping on her knees, handing Ben the book and eagerly waiting for him to start. "Okay so, let's start with the planets. This one," He points to the first planet, "Is Pluto."

"Ooooo."

"It's a dwarf star."

"Why?"

"Because it's small."

"Why is it small?"

"Why are you small?"

Olive seemed to be stumped for the rest of the lesson.

It was maybe twenty minutes into reading about objects in space before Lisa knocked on Ben's door.

"Hey guys." She greeted, stepping in and leaning against the frame.

"Hey, mom." Ben doesn't look up from the book, way more invested in Asteroids than he thought.

Olive didn't respond.

Lisa stopped to watch for a moment, smiling at the way Ben accepted Olive and Dean joining them.

It seemed like the only person Olive hadn't bounded with was her.

"Olive?"

"Yes?" She asked softly.

Lisa smiles, "I was just about to head to the grocery store and I was wondering if you want to come with me?"

Be nice. Socialize.

Olive sighs, "I guess so."

‧₊ ❁ཻུ۪۪.;:୭̥.┊

     "PASTA FOR DINNER?" ,  Lisa pinched her lips together at the options, one hand on the cart that Olive was in, "Fettuccine or Spaghetti?"

Olive, who was trying to spell out the ingredients on a box of waffles, looked up with a shrug, "I dunno."

She glanced at her, "Well, what do you like?"

"I dunno."

"What do you want to try?" She hopes.

"I dunno," Olive didn't budge.

Lisa rolled her shoulders back, "Okay, we'll defrost a pizza instead."

Olive smiles to herself, "I don't like pizza," She lies.

"I've seen you and Dean finish a whole pizza box in one sitting," Lisa recalls, frowning as they turned the next isle.

"That one doesn't count."

They both go silent, hovering around each other while Lisa puts groceries around Olive.

Lisa taps her foot on the ground, a swell of determination in her chest, "I really want to get to know you, Olive. You're someone really important in Dean's life."

"I do like you," Olive replies, shrugging. "I just don't know you."

"Well, don't you want to get to know me?"

The little girl hesitates, "No."

Lisa forced a smile, "We can make it fun. Make it into a game."

Olive smiled, "I-I like games." She mumbled.

"Awesome. So I'll ask you a question, and you have to answer, and then you ask me a question, and I'll answer." She explained. 'Make sense?"

Olive tilts her head, confused. "How do you win?"

"Uh..well..no one really wins."

Olive shakes her head. "It's not fun if you don't win something."

"But it is fun!" Lisa laughed. "I'll go first." She turns down the next aisle. "What's your favorite color?"

Olive thinks for a moment. "Green." She says. "What's yours?"

"Yellow." She states. Lisa steadies Olive as she jumps out of the cart. "See this is already fun! What's your middle name?"

"Grace," Olive answers quicker, finding a thrill of knowing the answers off the top of her head, "I remember my dad said a family friend picked it, I don't remember who."

"Your dad. ." Lisa repeats, seeing an opening, "What was your dad's name?"

"Oliver," She says, "My mother's name is Cora but my mom's name was Sophia."

Lisa felt like all of the important roles in Olive's life had been filled. She wonders where that left her.

She was dating Dean but he wasn't Olive's father, just her caretaker for now. She was just a woman in her life that gives her a roof and occasionally sleeps her with father figure.

"What was your life like before you met Dean?"

Olive's lips tugged down, "I don't want to talk about it," She says, "But Dean's the best for helping."

Lisa smiled. "Yeah, he's the best." She says softly, which makes Olive smile.

Lisa begins to think that she was done talking for the day and sighs. They get into the car, Lisa glances back to see if Olive's booster seat was buckled, straying on her as she plays with the ears of her teddy bear before they pulled out of the parking lot.

"What was life like before Ben?" Olive asked suddenly.

Lisa perks up at this, smiling. "Boring. I mean, believe me, I had some really good times but after him? He's the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't know who I'd be without him."

Olive smiles at this. "You're a really good mommy to Ben."

"Thank you." She hesitates for a moment. "Who was Sophia?" Olive stiffened. "I'm sorry Olive, I heard you mention her a few times, I didn't—"

"She was my mommy." Olive says sadly, "Not my real mommy— my real mommy wasn't as nice as Sophia. I only stayed with her for a few months but it was the best months ever." She smiles like she was remembering all the best parts of Sophia all at once.

"She must have been really good to you." Lisa states.

Olive nods, "She was the only mommy that I'll ever know. And no one in the universe can be Sophia."

"She seems like one of a kind." Lisa smiles, her heart squeezing.

"Do you have a mommy?"

Lisa laughs. "Yeah, yeah I do. She's pretty cool. I have a sister too, and she has a little baby. My mom did the best she could to raise us, even when I didn't make it easy for her."

Olive grins, "Dean says I don't make it easy for her either. I think it's because I hug his leg when he walks."

She cleared her throat. "What about you, you said your mom was pretty mean. .what kind of mean was she?"

Olive's smile dropped. "I...I can't."

"I'm sure it isn't that bad. ." She trails. "Did she takes your toys away? Make you clean your room? My parents were that kind of mean, always made me and my sister clean the house. I guess us kids give our parents a hard time for nothing. ."

Lisa was so caught up in trying to make a connection that she didn't notice Olive's panting from the backseat.

She didn't notice the way she grabbed at her chest even though there was nothing holding it down.

Neither of the girls noticed the other cars parked along the street, their headlights flicking on and off to the beat of Olive's panicked heart.

Olive thought at that moment, that if her heart was an elastic band it would snap any second.

". . Dean hasn't told me much about you, but I'm sure your parents loved you very much."

"Shut up! Shut up!"

Lisa's eyes widened. The car comes to a stop on the side of the street, "Olive–"

"Stop pretending like you know!" She bellows, "You don't know anything! You're a big liar!"

She reels back, feeling Olive's words linger in the air, causing tension. The young girl is panting harder, like she'd have a heart attack any second.

Lisa unbuckled her seatbelt and gets out of the car, running across the front and opening Olive's door. "Breathe. Honey, breathe." She soothes.

Olive turns her head away, feeling the woman rub her arm in comfort. Slowly, she breathed through her nose, then out again.

"Sometimes my feelings scare me," Olive admits, her voice aching and innocent, "When I'm sad, I get real sad. The sad that hurts so bad that you can't even stand it."

Lisa holds sadness in her eyes, "I'm sorry you feel that kind of sad, Olive."

Olive lets out a shaky breath. "My first mommy. When she's mad, she gets real mad. The mad that hurts so bad you never want to make her mad again."

"Did she. . .hurt you?"

Olive pulls her hand out of Lisa's and into her lap, "Can we go back home?"

Lisa pulls back. She overstepped, she realized that now, "Okay," She nods.

Getting back in the car, Lisa and Olive didn't say a word. Not even when they pulled into the driveway, or when Lisa unloaded the car while Olive ran up to her room without a goodbye.

In fact, Lisa hadn't said much of anything until Dean came back from his interview.

Again, she had told him about her concerns for Olive, spilling everything she had learned about the child as if it would help.

Dean thought she was prying.

Olive didn't come down for dinner and that's when Lisa felt like she messed up more than she thought.

A knock on the door makes Olive sigh.

"I'm sleeping!" She shouts.

Dean opens the door, holding two plates of food in his hands and closing the door behind him, "You missed dinner. Your frozen pizza refroze."

Olive turns her back, "I'm not hungry."

He doesn't take that answer, throwing himself on her bed and grabbing the remote, "Eat or I'll blend it into your milkshakes."

They settled on Scooby-Doo, which Olive had never seen. That offended Dean, but he tried to forgive her.

Olive had finished her pizza and was picking the pepperoni off her second one, watching her cartoons.

"So," Dean starts, his voice steady but firm, in hopes she doesn't think he sound angry, "Lisa says you yelled at her in the car."

She shifts.

"I'm not mad, just wanna know why," He shrugged nonchalantly.

"She thinks she knows everything," Olive tells him.

Dean hums, "Do you know everything?"

"No," She throws her hands up, "I'm gonna be six, and I can't read full sentences, they're all jumbled up all the time even when I should know the words! How can I speak all big but can't read all big?"

Dean hardly got all of that, watching her rant in one breath. She looked red in the face when she spoke. He found it amusing that she couldn't pronounce words out loud.

"Then, we'll enroll you into school. It's not like you're falling behind, you'd be in first grade," Dean suggests, "You'd start a little late, that's all. . ."

Olive frowns, "This is the start of a real long story isn't it. We're it comes back to Lisa—"

Dean smiles knowingly, "You're starting a little late, so is Lisa. Takes practice. You can't expect her just to know everything and get that way when she tries to learn."

"But she—"

"She was prying, I know," Dean says, "Like I said, she needs to learn, too."

"I've never done this before," Olive reminds.

"You think I have?" Dean tells her, "I've been on the road since I was 4 hunting monsters, I don't know the first thing about being normal."

Olive thinks for a moment, looking back at the TV, "Did you get the job?"

A change of subject.

He knew it well.

Dean leans back, "Yeah."

She nods, letting a beat of silence pass before saying, "Does that mean I can get a milkshake tomorrow?"

"As long as you don't want to go to college."

━━━━━━━━

PUBLISHED,    05/19/2020 !
EDITED,    9/25/2022 !
WORDS,    4082 !